When icebreakers attack (but don’t have to)

Let’s be real: icebreakers can be anxiety-inducing. We’ve all been there, faced with that moment where we’re asked to share a “fun fact” or our “favorite” something. My brain either goes blank or I reach for something generic. How is anyone supposed to come up with the perfect response that’s both accurate and mildly impressive on the spot?

This is exactly what my colleague Greg recently talked about in his post, When Icebreakers Attack, over on Same Page. His take on the awkwardness and anxiety that traditional icebreakers can cause really hit home. Inspired by Greg’s insights, I started thinking about the kind of icebreaker questions that actually do help people connect without all the pressure. So, I decided to try out his suggestions on TikTok (yes, I’m there now! More on that later) and here in this post.

Here’s the kicker: A good icebreaker should make people feel comfortable, not put on the spot. That’s why I’ve started loving a simple yet unexpectedly powerful question: “What are you listening to lately?”

Why this question? It’s easy, and it doesn’t put pressure on people to reveal something super personal or profound. Plus, it’s been self-serving in the best way: I’ve discovered amazing songs, albums, and podcasts that I wouldn’t have found otherwise. As someone who loves exploring new music, these recommendations are gold. It’s become a great way to connect with people over shared interests in a way that feels meaningful (and not anxiety-inducing) for both sides.

Want to give it a try? Here are a few other icebreakers I’ve found that get people talking without the dreaded pressure of a “favorite” question:

• “If you could learn any skill instantly, what would it be?” – This one gives people room to dream, without feeling like they need to prove expertise.
• “What’s one place you’d love to visit?” – Everyone loves talking about travel, even if it’s just a dream spot. Plus, it gives you insight into what energizes someone.
• “What’s your go-to comfort meal?” – Food is a great common ground, and this one is casual, easy, and insightful.

These questions work because they open the door to small pieces of someone’s personality, without the added layer of judgment or forced spontaneity. In short, icebreakers don’t have to be a moment of panic—done right, they can actually be an opportunity for genuine connection. And if you want more insights on creating a comfortable team environment, Greg’s original post on Same Page dives into the value of reframing traditional icebreakers.

Oh, and speaking of trying new things, I recently joined TikTok! If you’re interested in team culture, project management, or just seeing me step out of my comfort zone, come join me at @sameteampartners. I’d love it if you followed along and shared your thoughts in the comments.

Here’s to better, more comfortable connections!

4o